Young Gaff – Please Excuse My Introspection. Lyrics

I'm perfectly ok with melancholy
But I feel like people round me looking down on me
Like why you sad all the time
I don't I guess it's just the vibe sometimes
Like pain is where I find peace
Or at least a way to past the time
I feel like love has passed me sometimes
So I just stick to the rhymes
It's the only place I can survive
Or at least that's what I thought
I'm kinda waiting on these songs to flop
I'd be lying if I said I'm hot
In the back of my mind I'm just thinking man I'm such a fraud
My life feels like an ocean and I'm in a life boat
scared to admit I'm lost
Getting tossed by the waves in emotions
Everything comes with a cost
But I chose the wrong things to put my hope in and now I'm caught
Between a rock and a hard place
Y'all should feel my heart race
When I'm crying out to God, oh God

I feel like Jesus in the garden of gethsemane
Every time I pray it makes my head bleed
I love you, that's something people say but they just don't mean
I'm on a endless search for dopamine
Spilling my guts on these dope beats
But I can't find no satisfaction
My life feels incomplete
Yeah I'm the saddest fraction
I've been lashing out on people that I love the most
My reaction just a paradox I'm praying that you hold me close
Lord, I believe, but help me with my unbelief
I'm on my knees, feel like life is crumbling
That's how the cookie crumbles
Bought into the Mumbo jumbo
Now I'm standing in the rumble
That type of downfall will make you humble
Or else you in trouble
Had to realize that that problem is me
But that's hard to see these emotions got my heart deceived
These regrets like to haunt my dreams
Lord Jesus please
Hold on to me

I'm constantly looking for purpose
On the search of it
One of the most disturbing thoughts I've ever had
Is what if I get to the end of my live and I never have
Man that weighs heavy on my conscious
Tryna weigh the options
Yeah, I'm a dreamer
But my biggest fear is fulfilling these dreams
And still not feel fulfilled
I feel inferior
It's easy to fake the real
The house looks nice from the outside
But if you saw the interior
You'd probably never sign the deal
Yeah that's what my life feels like
They tryna gas me up but I can't even buy the hype
I'm tryna flash for likes and only show the highlights
Cuz if you saw who I really am
you'd probably just turn off the lights
Shoot, I might just do it myself
It's amazing how God can love me when I can't even love myself
For real

(Man sometimes you just gotta say exactly what your feeling
Just to put it out there, to give it no power
Cuz when you hold it in, it just rots in there, you know?
Man, these some of my thoughts.)