Clark ov Saturn – Cheetos Found in Space (feat. Socks and Sandals) Lyrics

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Good morning, this is Janie
Oh hi, Janie? Mhmm. How are you doing today
I'm okay, what can I do for you
Where are you
In Texas, Plano. Oh in Plano, Texas
Mhm
You getting a lot of calls this morning yet
Yeah. Yeah
Kinda busy? Yeah. Okay
Um, let's see
Well I just had a couple of questions and if you have time I'd like to read you a little poem
Of course
Oh, awesome
Um, so I just ate, you know, like a large bag of Cheetos
I've gotta say they were mighty fine
Haha
I just ate this bag and it's kind of unusual
Cuz I'm feeling really good you know
These are Cheetos Puffs or the Crunchy or
Yeah, but… there's different kinds
Well there's a Puff, the Puffs are baked and the Cheetos crunchy and fried
Oh, these are the fried kind
The Puffs must be better for you, huh
Yeah, they're a little baked
Yeah, they're a little baked
Do you like the puffs better
Yes, I do
Well I had these fried kind, I guess they're not quite as healthy
But I'm pretty happy
Okay
You know, I'm normally a little depressed
Have you heard from any like psychologists or psychiatrists
About any possible connection between like Cheetos and feeling groovy and less Depressed
Huh uh
Have Cheetos ever been along on like a US space mission or you know
Like have they flown to the moon or in a space shuttle or anything
Let's see here, I don't think so
No, they didn't tell me
Would you be able to confirm or deny
That NASA on their recent mission to Mars
Discovered water and a colony of peacefully living uh Cheetos
Peacefully living uh Cheetos
Haha, no no, I don't think so
Well one other thing I've noticed
Since I was eating the cheetos was um
I've noticed um… I started eating some yesterday
As well, and then today
I've noticed a couple longer eyebrow hairs popping up here and there
Oh, it grows hairs?? Haha
Well um that's what I'm wondering if there's been any test done
That could confirm a correlation between Cheeto consumption and such a phenomenon As that
No, that's just uh… I have not heard that at all
You haven't? And you haven't experienced that
No. Hm mmm
You haven't had the longer eyebrow syndrome
Haha. The unibrow? No
Hahaha unibrow
Cheetos connected to the unibrow phenomenon
You know, I know it's all about the fun
And the, you know the child like snacking good old fun and everything
But I just want to make sure there's no possibility
Of overdosing or any serious injury you know what I mean
No No, it's just uh cheesy stuff
You might get it on your fingers or something
Yeah yeah yeah cheese on the fingers exactly
Yeah, can I send you coupons in the mail if that's okay
Two booklets that I have
Oh… mm, well not just yet, I wanna get to the poem first
Okay
Are there any um documented cases of people
Suffering from seizures or stroke or extreme flatulation or
Anything like that?
Well there can be if they're allergic to something
Oh right right
That can happen if they're allergic to something in the Cheetos
Or a Flaming Hot or something else
Ooh Ooh Ooh Flaming Hot!
Flatulation
Peacefully living, uh Cheetos
So we'll get you started right here
I'll do a little poem for the uh Cheetos here
Crunch crunch
Oh Cheeto
Neon orange day-glo
Crunch crunch Cheeto
Cheesy cheesy powder delight
Pulverizey cheesy cultured milk
Salt, enzymes, litter crimes
Disodium phosphate monosodium glutamate
I ate artificial flavor
Give me a rub you
I love you and I consume you
And I consume you and you consume me and my time
Crunch destroy my mouth roof
Coated tongue and sticky finger
Yellow 6 goo, I love you
I love you Cheeto
Dangerously cheesy
Pleasey please Me
Dangerously cheesy dangerously cheesy
Dangerously cheesy
Cool cool cool